[Submitted by: NezumiPi
Should Tuesday’s circumstances ever repeat themselves, our liability-reduction officer would like to issue the following clarifications:
- Skilled, trained civilians (e.g., EMTs, police officers, etc.) may be deputized when necessary.
- Thor is reminded that deputizing street vendors does not obligate them to give him free food.
- Mr. Stark is reminded that making air quotes around the word “deputize” does not free him to use this emergency procedure as a pick up line.
- All staff (esp. Hawkeye and the Hulk) are reminded that deputizing animals is NEVER considered an appropriate course of action, though in hindsight, the cell phone videos of the Hulk running around Central Park yelling, “THIS DUCK OF SHIELD! AND THIS DUCK OF SHIELD!” may have been good PR.]